UHNW and HNW WOMEN: HAVING DIFFICULTIES TO FACE THE DAY

facets of you – UHNW WOMEN & MENTAL HEALTH

HAVING DIFFICULTIES TO FACE THE DAY

Join today’s conversation on why you as an UHNW or HNW Woman are having difficulties to face the day. Why is your bed so important to you through coping with your mental health disorder? How can you make it easier for yourself to deal with the start of the day? What does your bed represent. What happens to the state of your mental health as you stay in bed? What is going on in your brain? Read the experiences of UHNW and HNW Women who are seeking help from coping with the start of their day.

You are an affluent woman. You are shy or an introvert. Perhaps with low level autism. You live in an affluent home. You live an affluent lifestyle. You have weight fluctuations. You have dietary impulses. Yet right now you are finding it incredibly difficult to start the day and remain in bed. Your safe haven. So how do you manage your lack of energy and mental health illness from the place of your bed. Warts and all.

So now it is time for you to jump straight in and find out…

HOW YOUR MENTAL HEALTH IS BEING AFFECTED AND WHAT IS HAPPENING IN YOUR BODY ON CHALLENGING MORNINGS?

Consultant Therapist

Therapist Catherine: Mornings can be incredibly challenging when your biological processes and other external processes are putting up towers around you. When you have a drink to start the day it can start with a craving of strong drinks such as a strong cup of coffee or strong cup of black tea, just to help you awaken and get ready for the start of the day. The reason for this is your Circadian Rhythm. Your Circadian Rhythm is a biological function that has momentum during each 24 hours duration.

Consultant: Josephine

Therapist Josephine: Your Circadian Rhythm is an internal clock that activates at a cellular level and the Circadian Rhythm controls everything. You do not have one but numerous internal clocks called Circadian Rhythms.

When you digest your food this is controlled by a Circadian Rhythm. Along with your mood and temperature. As a general indication, on an average day your lowest mood would normally be at approximately 05:00 or 06:00. What we generally do at this hour is to take an extra 10 minute snooze before we venture out of bed. Especially at dark mornings. As the day progresses into daylight your Circadian Rhythm gets better, but this is not a direct target link to depression, however in depression your mood is usually more worse in the morning. Hence why some people are not habitual, happy, morning risers. Waking up each morning and swearing, being gloomy and saying negative comments is a good sign.

When your mood is worse in the morning your Circadian Rhythm clock is broken. It is broken because the genes that master your Circadian Rhythms is broken. Scientists have found abnormal levels of Melatonian [C13 H16 N2 O2] within individuals such as you with depression. This is the hormone that tells your body to go to sleep. Melatonin is very sensitive. Melatonin is sensitive to light and needs to get any natural light during the day. When your Melatonin is disrupted or out of synch, you shall feel low in the morning. Disliking the light filtering through curtains or window screens. Do you see how this is not your error in that you are having a tough time in the morning!

At some point in time we have all experienced a tough time in getting up in the morning. It feels difficult. This often compounds the tasks that you have to do each morning. Making things seem out of reach. Too much like hard work. The wheel of life feeling too hard to keep going that you begin to think that perhaps you have a flaw in your character to do the ‘simplest’ of things. Like getting out of bed. Like facing the day. Like a task that you have to do that day. So on and so forth. All of this is due to your Circadian Rhythms being broken and needing a readjustment and a reboot. Without this you shall spiral into further feelings of ill health with curtailing and depressive thoughts.

YOU ARE INCREASINGLY BECOMING A RECLUSE, WHAT DOES YOUR BED REPRESENT TO YOU?

Client: Margaret

Margaret: My bed is central to me. It is my sanctuary. For my getaway and peace of mind as I rest and sleep. I shut down and shut out the world. There are days when I just cannot handle going into the company. I have a designated company person who opens up the shop and runs things for me whilst I come to terms with my mental health issues. Some people have this idea that it is like having a ‘moody Monday’, or the ‘Monday Blues’. It is nothing like that. You just want to suspend your life. Enabling a postponement to it so that you do not feel any more suffering from life.

I find that when I wake up that I have a silver cloud feeling. This is quickly replaced by a negative set of thoughts to sink into. Not just to sink you for the morning, afternoon or evening, but to sink you for weeks. Months even. For however long that you have that sinking feeling you need to go with it, it is only then that you can make the road to recovery, once you have hit rock bottom. For some people it can feel like a heartache and we all know that heartaches can last for years. There have been weeks where I have lived in my bedroom with this depression. Months where I have wandered around the house in my nightwear and a house coat. Eating whatever I felt like eating and drinking alcohol at all hours of the day and night.

WHAT DO YOU DO? WHAT HAPPENS?

Client: Margaret

Margaret: During my mental health illness in suffering from difficult mornings I stay in bed and do very little. I tried reading new books and dealing with work papers but I simply did not have the energy. I sat in bed with my laptop and tablet and did very little correspondence. I was not really interested in other people. My mind was distracted. If truth be told I laid still and wanted the day to come to a close quickly. If I heard the door bell ringing I would not go to open the door. I would not go to the window. I would not answer the telephone on numbers I did not recognise. Even numbers that I did recognise I would let the number ring. I just wanted to hide from the world. I became a bit of a recluse with some questionable hygiene rituals. I was really low. Do you remember how Howard Hughes used to live when he went into a reclusive state? Well I was almost at that stage.

I have read some pages on depression. I have read the experiences of others suffering from depression and other mental health illness. I like these interviews and articles on UHNW and HNW women that are suffering with mental health issues. I do not feel so alone with my issues. It is a great relief to know that there are other women coming forward and sharing their stories. I know that I need a reboot of my life. That I need a support team to help my journey with depression, one step at a time. I know that I can do it with a right support team. That this is not a quick fix situation and that the road to recovery, or the road to management of my depression, is there for me to take control of and turn things around for myself.

Client: Louise

Louise: I feel empty. Deficient of love, emotions and happiness. I have remnants of the feeling of being sunny, happy and ready to get going with the day. I used to love being in a sunny disposition. Being able to get up and out. Profitable. Successful. Looking presentable. Meeting people. Eating out. That is not the way it is today. That is not how I feel today. I feel as though I am free falling into a bottomless pit. Spiralling out of control. My body feels heavy and leaden. I am overweight and I feel ugly. I frequently feel sad melancholy and find myself crying. I leave a shopping list for my housekeeper and she takes care of the upkeep of the property.

When I awake from crying myself to sleep or my alcohol fuelled slumber, I had fleeting thoughts about getting up and going out, but my body just did not want to follow through. I could easily stay in bed for many hours. Only getting up to use the bathroom. Spending the entire day in my dressing gown in bed. The weather and the scenery of where I live looks beautiful, but I feel no beauty inside of myself.

WHAT GUIDANCE CAN YOU GIVE TO OTHERS ON HOW THEY CAN MAKE THEIR MORNINGS A LITTLE BIT EASIER?

Client: Margaret

Margaret: Tea first thing in the day is what I make for myself. Strong tea. Milky tea. Sweet tea. If I am really stinky I shall take a long hot bubble bath in my spa designed bathroom. Changing into a kaftan and slippers and returning to bed or sleeping on the sofa with my duvet with the television on for company. Or having the radio playing just to take away the silence and the emptiness of the property.

Client: Anja

Anja: Music works for me. I play a favourite set of CD’s or listen to a favourite radio station. That is my ‘go to’.

Client: Estelle

Estelle: Trying to compartmentalise the absolute must do’s for the day. Such as checking my diary and the growing pile of post. Making a note to myself to make a telephone call to speak to someone.

Client: Anna Marie

Anna Marie: I have 24 hours to get through so if a lovely surprise finds its way to me that would make me emotionally happy. Lift my spirits up a little. Adding a little momentum of energy in my direction.

Client: Martina

Martina: Have some fresh air blowing through the luxury flat. I am allowed to look a mess but my home is not.

Client: Karen

Karen: Trying to make one meal a day for myself. Whether that be a salad, making a toasted sandwich or opening up a carton of soup. There was a time when I just ate cereals and the lovely food in the kitchen just rotted away because I could not be bothered to cook anything or ask my cook to prepare something for me.

Client: Denise

Denise: LAUGH. Laughter makes you happy and makes you want to start the day. Along with a good stretch.

Client: Inga

Inga: Go to use the lavatory. Use a nice smelling perfumed soap to wash my hands with so that I smell lovely even if I do not look it. Depression plays a game with me and for the time being it is winning. By taking small steps each day it is possible to overcome my mental health disorder in the long run. I just need to make one small step today to make today count for something. Perhaps holding my baby niece is a step in the right direction. A path to regaining a sense of a new me.

Client: Louise

Louise: Making an invitation for a friend to come by for lunch. Finding out if they have any allergies and creating a beautiful menu just for the two of us.

Client: Margaret

Margaret: Deciding upon taking my dog out for a walk instead of a member of my staff. Getting my clothes prepared for the walk including a large hat and sunglasses. Regardless of the season and the weather.